We have hundreds of conversations with our children throughout the year. They take on all kinds of different shapes, sizes, colors, and levels of importance. But how often do you ever follow up with your child about the outcome of these exchanges? Let’s say a father and his teenage son have a serious conversation about the son’s recent poor grades in school. They discuss potential causes, such as distractions, lack of time management, or difficulty with a particular subject. The father listens attentively, offers encouragement and asks questions, all the while helping his son engage differently with his school responsibilities. Not necessarily giving his son the solution or a mandate, they agree on a plan that includes creating a study schedule, seeking extra help from a tutor, and limiting screen time. When and how would you follow up with your son to see how the new plan is working?
In the whirlwind of daily life, it’s easy for parents to overlook the importance of following up with their children after significant conversations. Whether it’s to monitor the implementation of a plan, assess the resolution of a problem, or simply check on their progress, consistent follow-up conveys a powerful message: your child’s well-being matters, you’re a supportive ally, and you’re invested in celebrating their victories over challenges. This simple act reinforces the idea that discussions aren’t fleeting moments, but ongoing commitments to their healthy growth.
One crucial benefit of follow-up is that it solidifies learning. A single conversation, however impactful, can fade easily from a child’s memory. Consistent check-ins demonstrate a genuine interest in their development, reinforcing the lessons and plans discussed. This repeated interaction fosters a growth mindset, teaching children that challenges are opportunities for learning, and continuous improvement is valued. Instead of merely hearing words, they witness a parent’s unwavering commitment — which makes the teaching moment more meaningful and lasting.
Beyond reinforcing learning, follow-up builds trust and strengthens the parent-child connection. It’s a tangible demonstration of care, showing you value your children as individuals. These check-ins create a safe space for open communication, where children feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and feelings, knowing they have a supportive listener. This consistent engagement deepens mutual understanding and appreciation, forming a robust foundation for their relationship.
Consistent follow-up also provides ongoing support, essential for navigating the inevitable challenges of growth. Changing behaviors or overcoming obstacles rarely happens overnight. Regular check-ins allow parents to tailor their guidance to their child’s specific needs, offering personalized advice and adjusting strategies as needed. By providing consistent support, parents help their children develop resilience and the confidence to tackle future challenges independently.
Finally, follow-up demonstrates consistency and allows for progress monitoring. Actions speak louder than words, and by consistently following through on commitments, parents model responsible behavior. Regular check-ins allow for the identification of roadblocks and the adjustment of approaches, ensuring support is truly personalized and effective. This ongoing assessment empowers parents to provide tailored guidance that meets their child’s unique needs, fostering a sense of accountability and reliability that will serve them well throughout their lives.
In summary, consistent follow-up after any discussion demonstrates a dad’s genuine investment in his child’s growth and well-being. It strengthens their bond, fosters trust, and creates a lasting impact on the child’s development. Our children should be the object of our affection, and intentionality in this area of “following up” sends a clear message to them that we are on their team.
One final thought: following up isn’t always about changing course or course corrections. Sometimes — and, hopefully more times than not — it’s about encouragement and celebration of a job well done. When I follow up, I want my child to know I am excited to hear about their success (in small or large amounts), more than I am excited about them reaching perfection. Perfection may not be in the cards for them in this specific matter or circumstance. Effort and growth should win the day. It is OK when results fall short, and when , which hopefully opens the door to a teachable moment for next time.