A profound, yet often quiet, cultural crisis is reshaping the very bedrock of our society. It’s a crisis reflected not in financial markets or geopolitical conflicts, but in the internal lives of countless young men who are, for lack of a better term, checking out. They’re disengaging from the traditional expectations of work, responsibility, and meaningful contribution. This isn’t just an observation; it’s a palpable withdrawal from the shared endeavor of building a stable and flourishing world. The late Charlie Kirk, a keen observer of this trend, frequently sounded the alarm, warning against a generation of “lost boys of the West.” Now, in the wake of his passing, the urgency of this message has only intensified.
At Kirk’s memorial, his widow, Erika, articulated this concern with powerful clarity, underscoring her husband’s mission to “reach and save” these young men who are adrift. These aren’t just boys going through a phase; they are young men who find themselves without direction, devoid of purpose, struggling to connect with faith, or even find a compelling reason to embrace life fully.
For too many, the void is filled with the easy escape of distraction, the corrosive comfort of resentment, or the destructive energy of anger and hate. Her plea was a direct, moving call to true manhood: “Be strong and courageous for your families. Love your wives and lead them. Love your children and protect them. Be the spiritual leader in your home. But please; be a leader worth following.” This challenge isn’t about mere dominance; it’s a summons to
courageous service and principled leadership within one’s own sphere of influence.
The statistics paint a clear, if sobering, picture of this cultural shift. A widening gap is now visible across our educational landscape, with women significantly outnumbering men on college campuses, at graduation ceremonies, and increasingly, in leadership roles across various industries. While nearly half of young women are earning bachelor’s degrees, only about a third of young men are doing the same. It is, without question, a cause for celebration that women’s economic opportunities and achievements are expanding. I am thrilled by their success and the doors that have opened for them. Having a daughter myself, I see open doors for her and many other young women. However, we cannot in good conscience ignore the other side of this coin: the alarming rate at which too many men are failing to keep pace. As traditional roles shift and women’s earning power rises, a cohort of men feels increasingly lost. They retreat into isolation, resigning themselves to the sidelines, letting meaningful work, the responsibilities of adulthood, and the profound connection of marriage pass them by. A healthy, robust culture, after all, requires the strength and contributions of both women and men, each striving to live into their greatest potential.
I believe the root of this problem lies in a broken model of manhood. More than 60 years ago, C.S. Lewis offered a prophetic warning about “men without chests,” young people stripped of moral purpose and basic courage. He lamented that “We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honor and are shocked to find traitors in our midst.” Lewis argued that this risks raising a generation of men who lack both the conviction and a clear place to apply their strength. The difficulty isn’t that young men inherently run from
responsibility; it’s that society has failed to offer them a compelling vision of what that responsibility should look like today. The traditional model is obsolete, yet nothing equally inspiring or challenging has risen to replace it. For decades, we rightly celebrated new opportunities for women, but we neglected to offer men an equally inspiring calling. The consequence is that too many young men settle for the path of least resistance. How can we
instead encourage them to step into their true, powerful potential.
The solution: cultivating grit
To truly address this crisis, I suggest we revive an old-fashioned virtue with a modern application: grit. Grit isn’t about empty bravado or aggressive bluster; it’s the essence of true courage and resilience. It is the vital ability to face failure, absorb the lesson, and have the sheer tenacity to try again. Every successful individual understands that their greatest growth doesn’t come from their triumphs, but from their setbacks. Yet, many young men today are so paralyzed by the fear of failure that they retreat before they’ve even begun. How can we teach them thatfailure is not a terminal condition; it is the fertile soil in which genuine strength and wisdom take root and flourish.
This is not just a problem for society to solve; it’s a clarion call for fathers and mentors. Boys don’t simply “grow into” men by some accident of nature. They require intentional models, firm and compassionate guidance, and unwavering mentorship. They need to see, in the flesh, that true achievement is always worth the risk of failure, and that genuine strength is found not in personal domination, but in courageous service to family, community, and something greater
than themselves.
C.S. Lewis’s words still resonate powerfully today: we simply cannot afford to create “men without chests.” America, our families, our communities, our future need men of conviction, resilience, and faith, and men with grit. When we, as fathers, model and cultivate these qualities in the next generation, everyone, women, men, and children alike will ultimately flourish.
Dads, the future of our sons, and the strength of our families, doesn’t depend on a think tank or a government program — it depends on us. When was the last time we modeled what it truly means to fail, get back up, and lead with love? What is one thing you can do this week to show your son, or a young man you mentor, the difference between easy distraction and the hard work of building a life of purpose? Their future could depend on it. Let’s step into the arena of shepherding the next generation of young men, and walk back this trend we have seen over the
past decade.